MentorTalks In Session

In week 2, Erica & Hank discuss crafting your Ideal Life.

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How Life is Like A Game of Tetris

I was talking to my friend Jen the other night about how quickly things seem to stack up on my To-Do list and she said, “Yeah, it’s like Tetris”.  We stack up blocks, hoping to fit the pieces together just right so we can eliminate a line and free up space for more blocks.  Exactly.  The problem is that eventually the blocks start coming so fast that you can’t keep up – and then it’s GAME OVER.  Recently, I’ve written a good deal about never-ending to-do lists, GeekADD, and time management.  And today I want to talk about the word “NO”.

If you follow me on Twitter, then you probably know I have an obsession with Joseph Campbell.  Specifically with his ideas on Following Your Bliss.  In A Joseph Campbell Companion he says:

The Warrior’s Approach is to say “Yes” to Life.  “Yea” to it all.

Now I’ve found over the years that this approach – saying yes to every opportunity in life can have powerfully positive results.  The problem is – my time is finite, and opportunities are endless.  So after talking with my friend Karen, I’ve devised a new strategy to handle all the amazing possibilities of life.

Not Right Now

Saying “NO” for me is really hard.  Especially when I’m rarely presented with an opportunity I don’t instantly love.  My friend Hank says he’s “Never met an Idea he didn’t like”.  We’re obviously friends for a reason – cause I feel the same way.  So, I’m gonna try and ease my way into saying “NO” by starting with “Not Right Now”.

Deciding what to say “Yes” to and what to say “Not Right Now” to is fairly simple – as long as you have a list of priorities to guide you.  My current list of priorities looks like this:

1. Twilight & Tea Social Media Project & Book
2. Peanut Butter Media Client Work & Company Growth in 2010
3. ReinventingErica.com Project including Fitness Goals
4. Personal Branding
5. Travel & Adventure

Let’s try this out.  My good friend Julie comes to me with an awesome opportunity to be a part of a panel for an upcoming conference.  It’s an INCREDIBLE opportunity – and I’d really love to go.  The conference is paying my travel and accommodations, plus a small honorarium.  I would be speaking to a group of PR Professionals about Social Media, who would then take my ideas to apply to their client projects.  However, I’ve already committed to a client meeting with a potentially huge new client.  Since I can’t be in two places at once – what should I do?

As much as I’d like to speak at this conference, it is not related to Travel or Tourism and would not impact my Twilight & Tea Project.  So it fails to meet Priority #1.  Additionally, since most of the conference attendees already work in PR/Social Media there is a very slim chance that speaking would yield me any additional clients for Peanut Butter Media.  So it also fails to met Priority #2.  Speaking to this group might get me a few more subscribers to this site – so it could potentially impact my ReinventingErica.com project.  So we’ll say it might meet Priority #3.  And since speaking to a new audience would give me exposure, and traveling to a new location would be adventurous and fun, both Priorities #4 and #5 would definitely be met.

Unfortunately – I’ve already scheduled a Client Meeting with a potential new client that could lead to increased company exposure, increased access to additional markets, and a significant amount of money for my company.  Since this meeting meets Priority #2 head on – it trumps speaking at the conference.  So clearly – I must say no to the speaking opportunity.

The Problem of “NO”

But I struggle with the word “NO”.  When I say it I feel like I’m closing the door to a potential opportunity.  It all comes down to Fear.  In this case, The Fear Of Missing Out On Something Better.  So instead of saying “NO”, here’s what I would tell Julie.

Julie, I’m afraid that I have a scheduling conflict and that date just doesn’t work for me.  However, I know that you hold this conference twice a year, and I’d really like to be considered as a speaker for your next event.  Also, if you do any smaller meetings throughout the year I’d love to come speak to your group.

In other words – NOT RIGHT NOW.  By consistently honoring my main priorities I will decrease the chance of a GAME OVER, while at the same time LEVELING UP.

If you have trouble with saying “NO”, why not give “NOT RIGHT NOW” a test drive.  And be sure and let me know how it works for you

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You may have noticed that I blog a lot more frequently around these parts.  And I also hope you’ve noticed that my writing is improving.  If not, just nod, smile and pretend that you agree.  Humor me, okay?

Today Cory Levy (Teenage Upstart and Former NutshellMail Intern) contacted me about the Houston Edition of StartupDigest.  In the past, I would have been a logical choice.  I was once heavily entrenched in the Houston Startup World – in fact, StartupHouston once called me “The Heart & Soul of the Houston Startup Community”.  A title that I wore proudly.

I attended the first ever StartupWeekend in Boulder, and I was responsible for bringing StartupWeekend to Houston.  For the last few years, I’ve been the On-The-Road Correspondent for The Business Makers Radio Show heard on Talk Radio 950.  The Startup World and Entrepreneurship were at the heart of everything I did.

And as much as I cherish that community – I don’t feel like I belong there anymore.  When Cory asked me for suggestions for the Digest – I realized how out of touch I am with that world I once loved.  But I also realized that it’s not core to who I am today.

And then I realized it might be time to decide What I AM & What I AM NOT – Who I Was vs. Who I Want to Become.

Let’s start with What I AM NOT/Who I Was

I used to be one of the main Community Organizers for the Houston Tech & Startup Communities.  I co-founded BarCampHouston, StartupWeekendHouston, RefreshHouston, CSS Meetup and countless other organizations.  In the Trifecta that once ran most of the Houston Tech Events – I was the token girl.  My main co-horts were Ed Schipul & Kelsey Ruger with a dash of Marc Nathan thrown in for legitimacy (i.e. he was the only one always wearing a tie).

I loved being “Community Girl” – “BarCamp Girl”.  I loved organizing events and seeing people come together and share ideas.  I still love that aspect of Community Organization.  But now I feel like I’m ready to try this all on a bigger scale.  I’ll be honest and say that it’s hard to let go of that identity.  It’s hard to see the New Guard taking over.  But it also fills me with admiration and pride.  We started something good.

I’ll never forget my proudest moment – when my friend Matt Mullenweg (WordPress Founder) told a group of people he was having dinner with that I was “Single-Handedly Creating Community in Houston”.  Of course that wasn’t true.  I never did it alone.  I had lots of help.  But that comment still fills me with pride.

So I’m not Houston’s Community Girl anymore.  And I’m not a big part of the Houston Social Media Scene or of the Texas Social Media Scene anymore either.  I feel like city limits and borders can’t contain me.  I am no longer the Social Media Representative from Houston.  Now, I belong to the World.

And the World is a big scary place.

So Who Am I?

These days – more than anything else – I am a writer and content creator.  I am a female business owner.  I am a speaker and teacher.  And most of all, I am a student of life.

My goals for this next year are more introspective.  I’m not as concerned about shining in public.   I am much more interested in living life on my own terms.  I’m exploring topics that matter to me like Happiness, Productivity, Serendipity, Bliss, Influence, Motivation, Creativity and Simplicity.

I don’t want to be the leader of a community – I want to inspire a movement.

This year I want to wear labels like: Travel Writer, Entrepreneur, Fearless, Inspirational, Thoughtful, Impactful.

Perhaps Joseph Campbell said it best:

“We must be willing to get rid of life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

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I had this reassuring phone call with a friend today.  One that reminded me that I’m okay, and that we’re all in the same boat.  Let me explain.

It’s taken me years to recognize that I’m successful and talented at what I do.  Years to stop that voice in my head that says – “You’re a fraud, and one day someone is going to figure out that you have no idea what you’re doing”.  But I do know what I’m doing – and for the most part – I’m brilliant at it (the “it” in this case being Social Media, Web Design, Web Development, Writing, Blogging, Community Building, User-Generated Conference Planning, etc).

But sometimes I need to hear that I’m not alone.  That other people are having just as much trouble juggling the constant demands on their time as I am.  That no matter how easy someone makes this look – no one is perfect.  We all fall behind from time to time.  We all get overwhelmed.  We all forget.  Even those of us with assistants and staff.

So here’s my message for the day – “Do What You Can, Where You Are, With What You Have.” ~Teddy Roosevelt

Adding To My System

On Karen’s advice, I’m also adding the following to the systems I’ve been putting in place for my success.  Now pay attention cause this may get a bit complicated:

1. Currently I have a Master To-Do List that is kept in Basecamp and shared with my Team.
2. Additionally I also have To-Do’s on that master list added to the projects/clients they are associated with.
3. Each day either The Chief or Sarah calls me to do a Daily Check-in in the morning and evening.
4. We Read over the list adding new to-do items, and checking off accomplished tasks.
5. Starting today – we also transfer the top daily priorities from the master list to a secondary list on Rough Underbelly (I wanted to take advantage of the Printable CEO point system and minimize some of the overwhelm I felt when viewing the entire master list multiple times each day).  Plus Karen recommended that I concentrate on finishing only the 5 most important tasks on my list each day.  If I have time for more, great.  Otherwise – at least the most important things are getting done.
6. I’ve added 3 Hours of Quiet Time to my Schedule each day.  This is time I can spend doing client work, reading, writing, blogging, etc (without distractions).  During this time I close all Chat Programs, and Email, Twitter, Facebook, and other Social Networking Tools are strictly off limits.  I do not make or receive phone calls.  And most importantly I don’t worry about all the things I’m sure to be missing

So there you have it – I’m evolving my system to meet the demands of my current life.  It’s always important to stay flexible and to “NEVER, NEVER, NEVER Give Up.” ~Winston Churchill

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Yesterday was a disaster.  And yet, it was still better than the last 10 years of my life.  Go figure.

Here’s what I learned:

Sometimes everything will go wrong, and you’ll be helpless to stop it.

Having a Team to count on makes life easier.

Communication is the key to mitigating potential problems resulting from said disaster.

People, even clients, are human.  And they understand that sometimes stuff happens.

Dwelling on the past is not effective.  Scarlett said it best: “After all… tomorrow is another day.”

Love,
-Erica

P.S.  Today Was Brilliant.

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The Problem of Time

So I just sat down to write out a list of the things I wish I could do every day.  Some items were personal things like “Go Jogging” or “Read”.  Other items related to my Business, things like “Contact Media Outlets” or “Read RSS Feeds”.  And still others related to my current projects, things like “Blog at T&T” or “Contact 3 B&B’s” or “Send Out 10 Handwritten Letters for TGTE”.

The idea was to create a short Daily List of “Must Do” Habits for Success.  Instead – I ended up running out of room on the page – and quickly realizing that no single person could ever get through such an ambitious list every day, plus take on all the challenges that a typical day presents.  And so I find myself FRUSTRATED.

There has to be a way that I can get through more work in a day – and still do the things I love (and more importantly really want) to do.  Here are some options that I’m experimenting with:

Sleep Less

I can already hear the groans from here.  If you’re anything like me – you’re probably not getting the 8 hours of daily recommended sleep as it is.  But did you know that countless sleep studies have shown that most people perform well on just 5.5 hours of sleep a night?  Often referred to as Core Sleep.  This is the amount of sleep that the body seems to be programmed to obtain.

One of my new goals for the next 21 days is to develop a habit of sleeping 5.5 hours per night – and to track my productivity throughout this time.  I’ll be going to bed at 11:30 each night, and waking at 5:00 each morning.  Currently I sleep on average 7 hours each night.  This should give me an extra 1.5 hours of productivity each day, and 10.5 extra hours each week.  Imagine what you could do with an extra 10.5 hours/week?

Combine Activities

So often I miss opportunities to kill two birds with one stone.  For instance, I often forget to put on an audiobook while driving, and instead just put the radio on for background noise.  Now there’s nothing wrong with listening to your favorite playlist while stuck in traffic, but just think how much you could learn and how many books you could finish if you used that time for personal growth instead?  Or you could use that time to call clients, or go over your daily to-do list with a friend or your assistant.

Make your new mantra – Learning While Doing.  And start listening to Audiobooks or Podcasts while driving, cleaning house, or working out.

Also – try to group activities that are close to each other together.  For instance – if you’re running out to the store to buy dog food, why not also stop by the dry cleaners next door and drop off your clothes?  Start adding context to your to-do lists (this is a GTD method).  Do you need to be near a computer while doing 5 of the activities on your list?  Then try to get them all out of the way in one sitting.

Some popular contexts to use for grouping:

• @Home
• @Office
• @Computer
• @Errands
• @Calls

Delegate

I was saying the other day on Twitter that what I love about Delegating is that every time I delegate something, I get to cross it off my to-do list.  Then my friend Kelsey pointed out that just because I delegate something doesn’t mean I give up responsibility for it.  And he’s right (as usual).

But by delegating some of my less important tasks to my staff members – I do free up time to get paid client work and project work done.  Here are some of the things that I’ve had success delegating:

• Writing Thank You Notes to Friends & Clients
• Buying Gifts, Shopping for Personal Items, and Running Errands
• Sending Follow-up Emails to Clients
• Research & Data Entry Tasks
• Invoicing Clients

Now remember, I’m still very new to Delegating.  And I find myself hesitant to put trust in other people to get the job done.  One of my goals for 2010 is to fully master the Art of Delegation.

Progress Not Perfection

I used to be (and at heart still am) a perfectionist.  The problem with being a perfectionist is that you can’t get anything accomplished if it doesn’t meet your own, often impossible, standards.  Case in point.  Last week, my most important task on my entire to-do list was to send one of my clients a design approval form for his site – so he could sign off on the design (which he’s already told me verbally that he loves) and we could move forward officially.  Simple right?  Well – usually yes.  Except recently I hired 2 new staff members.  And now that I have an actual team that I’m working with – I wanted to come up with a new system for accepting design approval from clients – preferably using Basecamp.  I’m sure you see where this is going…

To make a long story short.  It is now Sunday Night – and I have STILL not sent over the design approval form.  And I’ve wasted at least 4 hours – first researching how other companies use Basecamp for this task and then procrastinating about how I would set this up for my company.

Sometimes it’s better to just get something imperfectly done – then to do nothing perfectly.

Swallow That Frog

I stole that phrase from Brian Tracy – but the idea is to do the hardest stuff first.  I actually work in exactly the opposite manner.  I practice what some people call Structured Procrastination.  In other words I can NEVER do the most important thing first until something comes a long that’s even more important.  Not good.

This is another habit that I’ll be working to cultivate over the next 21 days.  Starting as soon as I finish this post

Everything Has A Value

Stop wasting time on things that don’t matter.  While writing this post I thought it would be a good idea to sign-up for an Affiliate Account over at Audible.com.  Unfortunately – I got hung up during the sign-up process.  No matter what I did, I couldn’t get the site to accept the letters and numbers I was typing in the Captcha – even though they were 100% correct.  I spent nearly 30 minutes trying to get my application to process – and then it occurred to me I’d just lost $75.00 of my time (I charge $150.00/hour for my services) in the time I’d wasted trying to sign up for an Affiliate Account that might have earned me $25.00 on a good day – if I was lucky.  Sure, it would have been nice to have the affiliate link – and if I wasn’t so busy I would have stuck it out to the bitter end – but as things stand – I can’t afford to waste time like that right now.

Decide when something isn’t worth your while – and LET IT GO.

Final Thoughts

Time Management is tough.  I’m still learning how to DO More with Less of it.  But dangling participles aside, I think the real issue is FEAR.  I think we’re scared to be all that we can be.  Perhaps Marianne Williamson said it best:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”

Are you struggling with your own Time issues?  Because if so I’d love to hear about it and I’d love it if you’d share your own tips and tricks with me in the comments below.

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I’ve been struggling with this for a long time.  The truth is – I’m terrible at delegation.  Like many of you – I’m a perfectionist.  I have trouble letting go of control over my work.  I want to know my clients are getting a consistent experience – with my own special trademark touch.  But the truth is – once again I find that I am overwhelmed – both in my work and in my life.  There are two many balls in the air – and too many balls that are about to be dropped.

So tonight after careful soul-searching I decided it was time to hire a personal assistant to help keep me on track.

When looking for a personal assistant it’s important to know the exact skillset that will be most beneficial to you and your business.  In my case, I needed someone who:

• Has Great Communication Skills
• Is Well Versed In Social Media
• Is Details Oriented
• Is Able to Multi-task
• Is Good at Research (especially web-based)
• Can Handle Basic Data Entry and Administrative Tasks (without complaining)
• Can Be Trusted With My Passwords (and my clients passwords) To Multiple Social Media Sites
• Can Be Trusted With My Clients
• Has An Optimistic & Passionate Attitude Towards Life

Is A Virtual Assistant Right For Me?

My next question was did I want to use a Virtual Assistant service like Ask Sunday or Tasks Everyday – or did I want to hire someone I could meet with face-to-face on occasion.  After visiting the Ask Sunday site and chatting live with one of their representatives I decided that type of service was not right for me for 2 reasons.

1. Hours not used in a given month did not rollover to the next month.  Since I’m just now starting out – I’m not sure how many hours I will definitely use from week to week – and I don’t want to waste money paying for unused time.
2. While they were very professional and thorough – I decided that their service was not the right fit for my current clients.  I’d much rather hire someone who can meet with my clients from time to time on my behalf.

Both of the services I mentioned above are terrific – and might be perfect for your needs.  They just weren’t right for me.

Do I Already Know The Perfect Candidate?

So then I started thinking about the skillset I was looking for in the right assistant.  I was just about to post an ad on Craigslist when I decided to check with my former intern Wilbert Chinchilla first, to see if he was available.  I knew Wilbert would be the perfect choice for me for a few reasons.

1. He interned with me last summer and he knows how chaotic my daily schedule can be.  He’s very good at Embracing the Chaos.
2. He’s currently the Editor of his College Newspaper – and therefore very good at communication.  I knew that he would be able to respond to my clients emails in a professional manner.
3. He’s understands Social Media and actively posts to his own blog, twitter, and facebook accounts.  I knew that he would be able to handle these tasks for my clients.
4. He’s passionate and curious about Social Media and Writing.  Don’t ever underestimate the importance of Curiosity and Passion when hiring a new employee.
5. He had the availability that I needed during the week – and was willing to wake up early for me on Monday’s to help me start the week off right.  Monday’s are typically my busiest day of the week.
6. He works very well under pressure, takes good notes, and is very good at reminding me of tasks that I might otherwise forget.  Which means less balls dropped!

What does this mean for you and for my clients?

First and foremost it means more frequent communications on behalf of Peanut Butter Media and ReinventingErica.  We have plans to send out a monthly newsletter (which is something I’ve always wanted to do – but never had the time for).  If you’re a current client, it means that you should start receiving daily check-in emails from Wilbert and that your emails will be answered in a much more timely manner.  I currently receive about 500 – 800 emails each day (and that is not including Spam) – so sometimes (especially on Mondays and during Holidays) things get lost in the shuffle.

I’ll also have more time to work on several of my personal projects that have been put on hold these last few months.  Including: The Great Twitter Experiment, ReinventingErica.com 90 Day Challenge, and The Bliss Ring.

This was a very big step for me – and I’m excited to finally be taking the plunge.  I’ve given Wil the title of “Chief Executive Assistant” so that I can just call him “Chief” for short.  Afterall – his real job is to guard me against any waste of time – in that respect he’s really my Boss

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Every Sunday, ReinventingErica.com is going to do a weekly link post on Entrepreneurship. Each week I’ll scour the web to find the best posts on Business, Marketing, Innovation, and more.

The “Stick With It” Edition

“Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration!” ~ Thomas Alva Edison

• Why You Suck At Business Success
• Lesson #1 – Stick With It – Famous Entrepreneurs, Henry Ford
• The Prescription for Self-doubt, Watch This Video
• Perseverance and Why You Need It

Have you written a great post that you think should be included here, or did you find a great post on the web that I missed?  Let me know in the comments, and I’ll include it in my next update.

And if you enjoyed this post, consider following me on Twitter: @ericaogrady

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• Day 4 – Personal MBA, Honoring Commitments, & GTD Revisited