Photo by stephendl
The other night Mr. S asked me what it would look and feel like to be in the perfect relationship?Â And the truth is, his question caught me off guard.Â After everything I’ve gone through over this past year, I’m very resistant to the idea of “being in a relationship”.Â And that resistance intensifies when words like “perfect” are added to the mix.
But for his benefit, and my own, I think I’d like to answer his question.Â I’m a Capricorn, and by my very nature I’m stubborn, ambitious, and to a large degree suspicious of anything that seems “Too Good To Be True”.Â In my relationships I need Security, Honesty, and lots of good old fashioned Communication.Â More than anything, I want to believe in the Fairy Tale…but the fear – my fear – stops me.
I once made a list of everything I wanted in the “Perfect Guy”, and I’m going to share that list with you here on two conditions, 1.) No negative comments about my list.Â Think of this like a brainstorming session – where all ideas are considered valid.Â 2.) If you don’t like my list – too bad, it’s MY list – make your own.
- No Projects
- Killer Wit
- Success Oriented (ie. Ambitious)
- Down to Earth
- Not Ridiculously Good Looking (those one’s always cheat)
- Totally Independent
- Geeky (of the Tech Variety)
- Mostly Smarter than Me (a girl’s gotta have someone to look up to)
- Thick Skin
- Open Minded
- Willing to Take Risks – Big Ones
- Passionate About EVERYTHING
- Quick to Forgive
- Willing to Dance (doesn’t have to be Fred Astaire – but willing to try)
- Moody and Sullen sometimes (I kinda like that – plus I am too)
- Able to focus for long periods of time – cause I can’t
- Able to help me to focus
- Willing to start a company with me – even though it could turn out badly should our relationship go south (goes back to that whole risk thing)
- Comfortable being both the center of attention (ie. he’s got charisma) and being totally low key and watching me work a room.
- But likes to compete with me.
- Not terribly religious – but still honors traditions.
- Loves to Read
- Is Curious About EVERYTHING
- Doesn’t believe that anything is Impossible
- And Recently Added – Wants to Fly Me To Paris for Dinner (I’m Worth It Damn It!Â Just ask Brett…)
That’s it.Â That’s what I want.Â But I think it takes Strength to ask for what we want.Â And even more Strength to hold out until we get it.Â Too many people settle for Good Enough.Â They settle for less than what they want and deserve because they are tired of looking, waiting, hoping for “Perfect”.
But here’s my advice.Â Be Strong.Â Have Faith.Â I don’t know for sure that Perfect is out there – but this time around I’m going to wait and find out.Â The worst that can happen is I end up single for the rest of my life.Â And so far, that hasn’t been so bad!
P.S.Â To Mr. S, I know this wasn’t what you meant when you said I should write a post on Strength :PÂ And the Ballerina is of course, for you.