Note: I started writing this post when my previous relationship was still in the midst of turmoil – when I was still trapped by my own fears. I finished this post after that relationship had ended – when I’d finally given myself permission to conquer my fears.
“Whatever it is that frightens you has frightened someone before you. Fear is universal. It touches everyone – but it clearly doesn’t stop everyone.” ~Arianna Huffington
Girl Power.
During the WordCamp speaker’s dinner this year I burst into tears while talking with Giovanni Gallucci and Liz Strauss. I excused myself from the table – and went outside for some air and hopefully a little perspective. I’d been going through a really difficult time the last few months (personally, professionally & physically), and I had finally gotten to the point where I couldn’t pretend anymore. I couldn’t pretend that I was fine. I couldn’t pretend to be happy. I couldn’t pretend that everything was going to magically be all right. When I got back to the table, I apologized – and then briefly told Giovanni how my world had recently crashed down on me. I told him how scared, hurt, and lonely I felt. And how I feared that I’d never be able to recover. He gave me some good advice, and then he told me that from that point forward he was going to commit to following me around everywhere I went humming “I’m Every Woman” – my own personal theme song.
I laughed. But secretly I loved the idea. From time to time I still find myself humming “I’m Every Woman” when I walk into client meetings.
Finding My Everyday Power.
The truth is – I felt helpless. I had lost my personal power.
I found it again in the most unusual place.
Late one night while browsing through my facebook photos I stumbled on a photo of me and 3 other women from Gary Vaynerchuck’s Jimmy Fallon Viewing Party in New York. I don’t even remember taking this photo – but there I was standing next to Cathy Brooks, Randi Zuckerberg, and Julia Allison. Three Amazing women. Three Fearless Women. Three Women who refuse to apologize for who they are – who stand up for the courage of their own convictions – and who seem to believe that fortune truly does favor the BOLD.
Cathy Brooks practically a legend in Social Media, Randy Zuckerberg the Grand Dame of Facebook, and Julia Allison the world’s foremost expert on Personal Branding. I remembered that Julia had recently been on the cover of Wired Magazine, but I’d never actually read the article. In fact, of the 3 women, she was the one that I knew the least about.
I ran a quick search in Google for Julia Allison, and then I spent the next 3 hours reading her blog on NonSociety, watching her lipdub videos on Vimeo, and reading her dating column in Time Out NY. I never expected to like her so much.
She was smart, witty, and stunningly beautiful. But she was also naked, raw, and intensely vulnerable. She lived Fearlessly. And I found my own fears disappearing with every sentence I read. I decided then and there that I wasn’t going to spend another minute lying in bed feeling sorry for myself. Instead – I was going to develop a deep and complete acceptance of myself. Just as I am. Right now.
Suddenly Surrounded By Women of Power.
And when I finally dragged my pitiful self out of bed, I looked around and found that I was surrounded by Amazing, Powerful, Fearless Women. And the next time I looked in the mirror – I wasn’t helpless anymore.
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Erica OGrady is the CXO of Peanut Butter Media. She is currently HOMELESS while working on a project called Twilight & Tea. Erica is a Writer, Adventurer, Explorer who Still Believes in Santa and Following Your Bliss -- For more information Text ERICAOGRADY to 50500
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You are very welcome Bettina
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